yesterday, today and tomorrow..

semalam,

kawan aku beli webcam headset baru..

die sibuk nk try gaban..

ym la, skype la..

tp streamyx seperti biase mcm kura-kura kaki 3..

hari ni,

aku rase cuak..

aku rase sedih..

aku rase gembira..

segala macam perasaan bercampur baur..

so, x taula nk ckp sebnrnye rase ape..

esok,

hanya Allah swt sahaja yang tau..

selagi ajal belum berkunjung tiba..

insya Allah, aku akan menjejakkan kaki di bumi London.

p/s: currently mmg terase mcm xde perasaan..

p/s/s: flight 11.40pm malam ni~

raya!

sangat tak bersemangat~

2 strangers, 2 macam perangai

selasa, 15/9/09

it was a busy day!woke up as early as 9am(awal ke?) bergegas ke post office..sending receipts for visa and medical check up, mestilah claim kan!dekat 1 hibu habes..kemudian petang tu,bajet af nk break fast dgn teman2 di subang parade..on the way to ktm, singgah clinic amek results blood test.

alhamdulillah, everything is negative. then, Mak Long, singgah petrol kiosk. she went out to the counter. aku kt dalam kereta memerhatikan keadaan sekeliling.

1st stranger

ade 2 org mamat nih..sorang berjaket kulit hitam di atas motor, the other one in red. die tgh isi minyak ke dalam botol kosong. nk dijadikan cerite, tertumpah minyak ke atas tangannye. so, si merah tu pantas ke pili air berdekatan. i thought to myself:

"eh..xde sabun kt situ, mane bleh hilang petrol kt tgn tuh"

..aku tersenyum (senyuman ikhlas ok!) melihat gelagat si merah. tiba-tiba matanye menangkap pandangan aku yg masih tersenyum.

"kerek sial ko!

ko pandang-pandang ape?

senyum ape?!!"

haruslah aku terus buat2 x sedar die tgh ckp ngan aku kan. so, aku pon bajet2 membelek handphone di tangan. perangai mcm tu pon ade ke?

setibenye die subang parade..dapat sms dari syafiq yazid..he couldn't make it..so, tinggalla kami berempat; syazzy, eman dan azri(bersama-sama brownies nye!). after breaking fast at kenny roger's, dan berase tersangat-sangat hyper sebab pnb dah bagi allowance, kami ke surau utk menunaikan solat maghrib. ramai sgt org!

2nd stranger

i had to Q-up utk berwudhu'..and then ade this one pak cik kat depan. mase tgh pandang die ttbe die toleh blkg. so, aku mengukirkan senyuman sambil tu dlm kepale otak ni,

"alamak, matilah kene pelempang..(teringat case kat petrol kiosk)"

"tadi tu jarak sebatu(ok,exaggeration terlebih) ni face-to-face!"

pakcik tu membalas senyuman..

and so it's 八月..BTN

hachigatsu, august..

i've tried writing 2 posts yesterday, but in the end i lost my interest somewhere in the middle..PHAILED!

so, my august dimulakan dgn BTN..sgt malas!1st mindset, kne basuh habis2an..so, i literally, dragged myself to kem bina negara, meru..not very far from my home. the atmosphere was just horrible. our KF was this lady who i couldn't remember her name. she's nice. i could tell. but the other jurulatih sangat lah annoyingly x best!so, basically, the 1st 2 days were just plain agony with the so-called "pembentangan kertas kerja"..uurh, mule2 smgtlah nk salin..but in the end, there were more "artistic lines" rather than notes. LMAO. pandang kiri, pandang kanan, almost all sedang khusyu' berzikir. the only thing i remember is "BULLSHIT!!". i think that was from the 2nd speaker who successfully made us stay wide awake for the whole 3 hour-talk. owh before that, we were suppose to elecc the committee, and guess what? ramailah budak kyuem yg dilantik:

penghulu: Kamal 10.5

pengulunita/penghuluwati/mak penghulu: Nazu

penolong mak penghulu: Nanthini

Food exco: me and vellu (haha!)

Hall exco: Mai

Emcees: Atiqah, Nadiah Amirah.

cemerlang bukan? hehe.. so 2 hari pertama diakhiri dengan test yg byk soalan mencuit hati!serious x tipu.. and by the time 30 mins, the hall was almost empty! my dorm plak, sume bdk2 PNB and a few of others frm sri cempaka and also other places. nuff said, penyiksaan pon berakhir. things got better on the 3rd day. we were divided into groups. mine was "Prajurit Tanah Air" which was also the title of our theme song which was to be presented mase malam terakhir. the Members, me, cha'er, ZB and khairul fahmy(midi look-alike, doing IB in london) yana kisas, mai, belle, faizah rani (aka pa'e kwn midi, bakal guru bahase perancis), jenessy (alamak, xreti eja, sabahan, also going to france), aime(economics in japan) and miao shan(ktj, robinson college, cambridge, law). fasci plak adalah abg s*** yg sgt best. umur die 23 thn. now doing 2nd degree in nuclear science..1st was engineering..gap umur x jauh sgt, so die sgt memahami. awal2 je die dh ckp, x perlu takut, saye akan bagi semua lulus. and those group activities yg kne buat, ktorg x buat pon!hahah..die byk bercerita la..psl zionis, wars, ISA mcm2 la lagi..sgt best!kesian la plak kt groups lain yg kne buat presentations and blah3..too bad!=p and the group activites kt hall were quite OK. i think all of us had fun. owh and the night yg kne perform our theme songs, we got 2nd!haha..x practice, sume spontaneous acts from cha'er, ZB and fahmy!but i guess it was good kot. we got the spirit!LOL and that night jugakla we could see miao shan's true colors; she's really perky!mlm terakhir so she was quite enthusiastic! but all in all, BTN was horrible and a lil bit of fun. but still, up till now, why menara bangsa???why??!!nasib baek la that's not our national anthem!ROFL.

ok..now, i need to continue with kuih raya baking..nnt sambung lah lagi..kalau rajin..hek3

woooahh! i skipped 2 months~

yay!i'm making an update..

it has been really busy these 2 months..and i really mean it..BUSINESS!

somewhere in july, i was invited to kys for the orchestra..2 minggu kat sane..best!

i made some really memorable encounters..

reminisced back the good old times with form 4's and 5's..(these were my form 1's and 2's back in 2006)

tapi seriously, mase datang..i feel really old!and those kiddos yg dlu comel2, skrg dah handsome2 and lawa2..omg!i am old!

and that some new encounters with form 3's, 2's and 1's..i felt like the good old 'Abg Za'ba'..

but obviously la, i wasn't the only kyser there..

of course there's kak leen, who officially got appointed as a part-time teacher during my stay there..she was the headgirl of 2004..and also the concert master of that year..

razeen, org melake..CM 2006..also jadi part-timer gak..

and then ninzy, principle cellist 2006..helping out ms lillian!

there was zaf, principle trumpeter 2007..also the headgirl of that year..

and last but not least, bagok "my adik ipar", principle trumpeter 2008..

boleh expect la kan..every day lepak music studio je..

1st day je semangat bgn awal pergi breakfast kt dining hall!haha..

masuk 2nd day pkl 9 pon blom tentu bgn..ye ar kan..kyser!

so klu pagi2 tu, confirm la kan pergi cafe ngan kak leen and ms lillian..

owh btw, ms lillian is our strings teacher..majoring in cello i think!owh and she speaks japanese!

her husband was my japanese language teacher..haha..

then mesti balik studio before break time..coz the juniors will come and practise!

like REALLY practise!terkejut gak ar mase mule2 datang..we never really practised for orchestra other than the night classes and rehearsals!

it's all thanks to the new music teacher, ms adrin, MYPO double bassist!mmg ar strict gler..

my 1st practice with her was the night right after i arrived there..scores lagu baru pun baru dapat..mmg garang ar..x tipu..1st time the stage was pin-dropped silence!impressive!

haha tp in the end she let loose gak..bagi chocolates to all of us a few times..

owh and one i like about the studio is we gossiped!hot topic; shim!*bukan name sebenar

the ever hated person in the music dept. students ke, teachers ke..sume benci..mane xnye..

waktu class x mengajar, bleh plak maen game! ini bukan buat cite..mmg kami kysers observed!

bleh kate every hour ade je cerite yg dibukak especially by the juniors la..jess, ah khau, khye, sara ruz, nael, mona, kc..owh and nael is the pres of music club..kesian gler tgk die..kne tahan dgn shim!and use kysers, mmg annoyed with him..last minute work la, he even asked us to teach the juniors during day classes!and he'll be on his comp doing who knows what!and i dont know what happen to late mr chiew's (previous woodwind and brass teacher) notes, warm ups and books!

and its a good thing ms lillian passed down late mr chiew's books to me. aah tibe emo..enough of shim!

so the studio brought back memories of me, mase form 5 with those kids and kak leen..we laughed, we shed tears.we practised for ABRSM(really?) haha.. more like, aah tension nye scales!x hafal2 lagi~..jom borak~!rofl..padan la grade 5 dpt 107 je!but seriously, those were the good old days..and practices awal2 mmg tensed..and i can really feel the fear from the juniors..there was no joy in the songs played..datang practice mmg for the sake of datang practice.. mmg x best.. sgt x enjoy..being the shrewd kysers as we are(cheh..) ktorg buat la a heart-to-heart gathering with the orchestra members..sharing is caring kan?=p but alhamdulillah, after that everything improved by tenfolds!even more~and being in the orchestra felt like it was still 2004~2006..macm kat terengganu, perlis, penang, johor, perak..

and that time la i feel like sharing my experience with the other trumpeters; chu-kk, kelent and poppy..hopefully they'll pass down the things that i've taught them to the juniors..duh!shim x ajar kot~and i;m proud to hear from kak leen yang chu-kk ajar the form 1s and 2s trumpet the other day..*tears*

ok the night of performance, mmg best!seriously, everyone was soooooo energetic!especially when playing prik kit nu and rong dung dung-songs arranged by late mr chiew..though shim was the one who conducted..and ms adrin's blue ridge saga, dance of a sugar plum fairy and universal band collection were superb!mmg enjoy gler..owh and encore rasa sayang (also by late mr chiew) pon mantap. i cant compare it with 2006. not because it was too good or anything. it just felt different. the vibes were different! and it just felt right. you can actually feel the soul of each member in the songs!after the VVIPS left..(tan sri couldn't make it!*sob) the audience requested for 2 more songs!haha guess what?!rong dung dung and prik kit nu!mmg all out habis la..they requested for another one.. but ktorg semue dah pancit..haha..but all in all, memang best!sangat best..and i'm pretty sure the audience enjoyed as much as we did!

so..that was the rest of july for me~nnt updates for august plak =p

lesson for today..

i watched 2 seasons of anime in 3 days..
little did i know that the ending will be super sad..
5 dear friends get separated for their own dreams..
after 5 years of being together...

"Everyone is the same as they were before, but they are also different from before..
I've changed too.. That time is really over.."

and now i'm back to being mellow..sedeyh!!!!

the lesson: jgn tgk cepat sgt..sampai episode akhir menangis x berlagu..

Ai-suru Mars-Reiko chan!!=p

ね..ね..皆さん!!

ne..ne..minna-san!!
hey everyone!!

此処は見て!
kokowa mite!
look here!


北川景子は本当に奇麗な~
Kitagawa Keiko wa hontou ni kirei na~
Kitagawa Keiko is really beautiful right~

迚も可愛いだね~~
totemo kawaii da ne~
SO THE VERY CUTE kan~~(hehe..)

マースれいこちゃん, 私はあ貴女の一番のファン!
MARS-Reiko-chan, watashi wa anata no ichiban no FAN!
MARS-Reiko-chan, i'm your number one FAN!!

mane kamu midi??

ttbe, buat post tros..
fyi, aku x jumpe lagi kawan aku nih di alam maya...
yang lain sume dah~
bile hang nk on??
rinduuuuuu~~

and...dah berjaye download satu album dafi~
currently, obsessed with seumur hidup~~*

dafi seumur hidup

cubaan pertama!

still trying to get rid of this mellowness~
so, i went on web hopping for some hot mp3s..
and i found this!

Ular Berbisa - Hello

btw, sesape yg singgah, tolong lah comment~
especially p20!
aku meroyan sesorg nih~~~~

graduated and sad..

i miss my friends already!
aku sayang korang semua!!!!!!

gonna take awhile till i recover from this mellowness..

of Kau Aku bila terasa rindu

"Aku menyesal."
"Aku pun."

itu majlis wida' malam tadi. tak guna nak menyesal. menahan sebak di dada. air mata diikat erat. senyuman dan tawa mengaburi kusammnya kesedihan hati. biarlah senyuman ini menjadi imejan terakhir buat teman daripada tangisan. aku optimis. degan izin Allah, kita akan berjumpa lagi.

sekiranya anda tertanya-tanya apa erti tajuk post ini, ia adalah gabungan tajuk lagu dendangan aizat dan dafi. memang kena dengan theme post ini. Kau Aku, Bila Terasa Rindu. penuh makna.

i left end-of-sem dinner early. balik, mandi, solat. i'm never good at saying goodbyes. and this was the 1st(and of course the last) sem dinner i attended as an audience. no performers fright anymore. just friends and food. memang malam ni agak suram sikit. ye lah. all of us will be graduating tomorrow. and that's it. only Allah knows when we shall meet again. i'm too mellow right now. mahu menangis, tapi hati menghalang. target aku. senyuman untuk teman-teman di saat-saat akhir ini. sabar. kurang 15 jam je lagi.

"mengejar mimpi, yang pasti akan aku merasakan kehilanganmu"
"walau di mana kita berdiri, di dalam dunia ini, biar sampai akhirnya nanti."

-Kau Aku-

"beginikah rasa, seksa perpisahan, sunnguh anehnya, hidup berasingan"
"tetapi ini sebahagian dari pengorbanan, bekalan; andainya hari sukar mencabar"

-Bila Terasa Rindu-

kepada:
shouk, hizbul, herman, iman, midi, syazwan, syafiq yazid, naQ, p.chek, sulwan, luttphi, syera mat, fara ain, nabihah, j-lo, farid, azri, furqan, suman.

ini bukan perpisahan! ini adalah permulaan baru yang indah. ingat, kita semua mengejar mimpi. make sure we strive till the end!all the best!i'm going to miss all of you!no doubt about that.

till we meet again. times and places that we'll never expect.

urh..uhh..aahh..

the list:
play RO till my nose bleeds!
watch anime like there's no tomorrow.
download anime like it's gonna be free only till today!

anime list to watch:
all time favourite tsubasa chronicles! i want season 3 la CLAMP! damn it..
xxxHOLiC- the season i missed

and the non-anime list:
ghost whisperer season 4!yippeee!!!
Tru's calling..
and lotsa movies pending!!!!!


bahana habis exam!=p

kerna siput (babi)..

kenapa saya tidak 'mengupdate' blog selepas p3??
bak kata midi, "aku dah masukkan memori itttuuu ke dalam kristal dan dicampak jauh2 lalu berderai 100000000000000000 keping" - ayat ini telah diubah suai mengikut citarasa penulis.

anyway, today..well yesterday since it's already sunday, i sat for my 2nd last paper!!
wooohoooooo!!~ 1 more to go..after all the hard work with chem p4 and s2 last wednesday-macam paper further plak, 3 jam kt dlm exam hall petang2, i totally had lost my momentum to study @ reviewing my work. mane tak nye, both papers started in the afternoon session; 2-3.45pm and 4-5.15pm. not that i'm underestimating paper 5, penat lah!!! so i did very lil of reading with the new syllabus paper 5. tahun 2008 nye paper semakin merapu. so tidak terkejutlah kalau-kalau this paper akan meraban tahap maksima! nuff said, the morning before the paper, i refused to wake up early, just in time to go for lunch. i'm not going to do anymore reading.

lepas solat jumaat, waktunya tiba. cuak. masuk2 confident dengan langkah kanan bersama-sama selawat ke atas nabi. duduk. paper diberi-waiting for datuk B's cue.

"you may start now! you have 1 hour and 15 minutes."

cliche.

1st question:
an apparatus with cut shoot in a testube filled with dye.
owh..nk carik xylem.
crapped bout making microscope slide and all.
the 2nd part was about why not use intact shoot??
-suberin layer terpacul dari otak. damn!!!i forgot the term!!
selawat dibaca beberapa kali, alhamdulillah- voila! Casparian strip.
i didn't revise AS btw. bersyukur masih ingat.
3rd part was about how you'd use the apparatus to measure water movement rate up the shoot.
at first i was thinking of measuring the time take for the top-most leaf to change colour. too qualitative i guess. i wanted to make a potometer out of it but not sure whether or not you're allowed to modify that. so, some random spark of inspiration came to me! measure the height of the solution!tulis punye tulis, shit!asal tetibe buat essay plak nih. taulah 6 markah! dang! so i added in bracketed numbers before each sentence. next part was how to measure the rate. no problem i guess. the last part-respiratory inhibitor added into dye. lower uptake kot.

question 2:
siput (babi)!!!
bace lah cerita mak nenek yang diberikan. panjang. lebih setengah page. i kept repeating myself trying to make sense of what i was reading. pensel sedang galak menggaris dan membulatkan kata-kata kunci!dah pening lalat. results dah diberikan. 1st question, independent and dependent variables. alhamdulillah. 2nd part, explain the results! sentap! bermain-main mata dengan soalan selama 5 minit. menjeling-menjeling..mata kita sama memandang. motif lagu datuk siti ngan SM salim berkumandang?? failed! ended up in vain. lompat ke soalan seterusnya. recapturing method! atau masa spm dulu: tangkap, tanda, lepas dan tangkap semula. 2 investigations were given. akibat kebingungan soalan ini, shouk menjadi heeeemo dan mencipta teknik baru; tangkap, tanda, lepas dan BUNUH SEMUA! explain why the 1st investigation is more likely to be reliable than the 2nd on..harus aku terbang ala-ala mila terjun dari awan ke awan terus ke soalan seterusnya..

question 3:
continuons culture of R. gutilinis. wasn't in awe or anything because last semester was about electrophoresis, also an application topic. 1st part ok, 2nd part pon boleh merapu lagi. 3rd part macam pelik. not sure whether its a trick question or not. jadi aku pon bantailah- we cannot determine whether or not the difference between those 2 samples is siginificant because no staistical test has been made. pastu, pasal degree of freedom. alhamdulillah. next part nih lagi pelik. calculated t value was given. tapi table of critical values mane??!!motif kau bagi aku bende tuh sebatang kara. given information was purposely ignored-bajet diva. error in printing kot. soalan terakhir dijawab dengan helaan nafas lega!oopppss..not too fast..soalan siput babi masih membutuhkan perhatian.

after half an hour thinking of suitable as i would call it "crapping-mechanism-for-deperarate-marks", the clock showed 3.45pm. 15 more minutes. checked a few times. then..termenung memanjang memikirkan nasib paper nih. check pon bukannye tau btol ke salah. tensi! meraban je lebih. ku pandang sekeliling, sume khusyuk menjawab. *dead meat* asal sume nampak macam confident terlebih je mase jawab. habis exam semasa melangkah kluar GH, sume orang dok bising-bising paper mcm hanjjjgggghhh. what a relief. memang rapuan siput (babi) btol jawapan-jawapan aku tadi. nuff! tawakkal ajo! ibab tupis!!!!!!!!!*hati ku terus menjerit kerana meroyan*

and it's 1.30am

looking at my watch, it's 1.30am
date: 27th may 2009

oh no!!!!!
biology paper 4 this friday!
maths p3 this friday!

alhamdulillah..done with the text book..
but, so0oooo many work to be reviewed!
p3 down the drain!
need to start reviewing later !

Ya Allah, kurnikanlah kekuatan kepada hamba-Mu ini! Amiin..

p/s:
read something in one of my fellow bloggers:
wajarlah dia emo..
back a year++ ago, i was in the same situation!
i know how it felt!

favourite song atm!

Masih Jelas
by Hafiz AF7

Beralih, musim ke musim
Hati tetap serupa
Tiada yang berubah
Dari hari, dikau pergi
Dikau pergi

Penjara, hidup ini penjara
Tanpa ada simpati
Kepada sang Kekasih
Yang dilanda, yang dilanda
Kehilangan

Chorus:
Masih jelas
Setiap garisan halus
Bila senyuman kau ukirkan untukku
Masih jelas
Setiap lekuk penjuru
Menghiasi wajahmu
Waktu kau renung aku

Ratib sendu..
Ratib sendu
Bergetar dalam kalbu
Hingga menitis linang
Dari kelopak mata
Keranaku, keranamu
Dipisahkan

Chorus

Chorus

Sudah suratan takdir begini
Segalanya sementara
Selagi hayatku masih ada
Kau bertakhta di hatiku

Beralih, musim ke musim
Hati tetap serupa
Tiada yang berubah
Dari hari, dikau pergi
Dikau pergi
Dikau pergi....

fyi, i didn't copy and paste this!i wrote this as i sing!!gembiranya dah hafal!!wakaka..
kalau lah bio+chem boleh dihafal sebegini senang~~

relieved and refreshed..

i'm free!well, not literally. but it's good to know that i've done the right thing. hafiz who sang AZ's song- kau bunga cintaku kinda reminds me of this other song of AZ. coincidentally, it fits my situation right now~

Teman Terulung
by Anuar Zain

Bila bertaut senyuman
Mata berlirikan
Memancarkan keluhuran
Cerah kesederhanaanmu
Seindah kejujuranmu

Detik seia sejiwa
Terungkap setia
Tiada upaya sepi
Mekar kudup penantianku
Hadirnya teman sejati

Melangkah kita menjejak mimpi
Bahagia berdiri dengan mu disisi
Harapan kita meniti hari
Sentiasa seiring

Paling agung teman terulung
Tenunan emas sayap hidupku
Tak inginku undur bertamu
Bertakhta teguh
Ke akhir waktu.

very insightful. you know who you are..

hafiz!!!!!!!w0000t!!

mila!!!! =p

you rock!


congratulations!!!

ignorance is bliss..

that is, if you don't know about it..
if you do know about it and try so hard to ignore..
hell, it's a b*tch!

but i'm doing the right thing for now..
keep ignoring and avoiding..

p/s: i'm having like hell lotsa butterflies in my bellies..waiting for sunday to come..and this 1 year++ of waiting will end..

finalists..AF fans only!

as expected!!!hafiz!!!!woooohhooooooO!!!ftw!!!!
mantap gler ar!!!!!you really can fly!!!!

akim, isma, yazid and ARIL!!!!!
sigh..malas lah nk emo2..yg penting hafiz mmg mantap!!!
riuh satu dewan~~mcm confirm je edry hashim tulis lagu final utk die..wakaka!

as of just now:
oopss..it's the final week..
won't be able to see afundi terkini~

and now, evryone..afundi hafiz!
i'll start this week..so klu, sms x reply..phm2 je la~XD

what's waiting..

Assalamualaikum semua,
Apa khabar & hope everyone sihat coz' dah nak exam kan.....so, GOOD LUCK!
Below are the pre-departure programmes schedule:
1. OBS at Lumut Perak = 1 to 25 of July
2. Biro Tata Negara at Meru, Klang = 10 to 14 August
3. Pengukuhan Rohani at Port Dickson = 17 to 19 August
4. With Tan Sri = 21 August (tentative)

Please be informed that attendance is COMPULSORY..... and details of the trip will be informed at later date
GOOD LUCK and take care.

Regards,
Rukiah A Samad
Education Development Department
Performance Assessment & Integrated Education Division
Permodalan Nasional Berhad

comment: huhuhu..habis a level serupe mcm x abis je~but!!!bleh gi MOC!!!=)

kakak cafe..

aku: nk coklat satu..(jari dituding ke arah dutch lady chocolate)

kakak cafe: (dutch lady cofee diberi)

aku: (bayar duit)

kakak cafe: (cash-in dalam mesin)

aku: air coklat kak..

kakak cafe: bukan td mintak kopi ke??!!(nada marah)

aku: ..(amik air dan belah)

di meja yg ade hizbul, ken, jojo, wai shan, audrey, letha.

motif akak tuh ttbe emo ngan aku??
@^(*())_*$!(&$!(_!!!!!!!!

yg lain: (senyap terkesima)..

kesimpulan: hanjeng btol kak cafe tuh! PMS xyah ar lepaskan kt customer. noktah.

classes coming to the end...

maths-this friday is the last class.
bio-next monday.
chemistry-not sure yet..

this marks the starting of Cambridge International Exam!
my paper starts 29th May 2009.
pray for me~
amiin..

warning: AF fans only!

i'm pretty pissed off with the fact that they actually allow AFMASUK this year! again!!

re-cap:
AF3-marsha got back in
AF4-lotter got back in.

and now, they want aril back!a big NO! it'll only be fair if only claudia and aishah are the ones to be voted in since they were the last to leave. imagine this, someone left like weeks ago; skip the 9th week-obviously the result will be after the 9th concert, and straight to final!not fair. not fair at all! pity the voters. i'm not one of them =). but my mom is!!!

*sigh sigh sigh*

whatever it is, i loooooove this week's concert!

hafiz rocks!! you guys should really watch him perform!

as of just now:
hafiz-66%
akim-31%
yazid-4%
isma-2%

yay!but it's sad that now no more aishah and claudia..yang 2 kat bawah tu bile la nk kluar(harapan~)..

of ladybugs and pests~~

today..

KPM universities list on the board!

most of them were pretty unsatisfied with their sponsor's decisions.

today..

i signed up for MOC!

but there's a high chance that i won't be joining because of PNB.

today..

i took my yearbook photo picture!

though yesterday i decided to stick with the pic taken when i first entered college.

today..

ms aizan gave us mock for p3!

if it wasn't for the ladybirds and pests, DE may be easier.

today..

i didn't do anything productive!

it's all because of p3.

today..

13 more days to 1st day of CIE!

how time flies.

today..

i updated my blog!

the title is "of ladybugs and pests~~"

finally!!!an update~

*bersawang*
"update laa."
"nantilah, takde mase free.."

the truth: every time i tried logging in at college, it failed. bloody connection!at home, i barely remember to update.

and finally..i'm updating..wasn't planning on to write anything till i suddenly had the urge to view my blog. checked my fellow bloggers' updates and 1 grabbed my attention. hizbul's.

after months of trying to choose between imperial and UCL, i've decided to choose both.

Firm:
Imperial College London
Biochemistry (BSc)
3 years
AAB-Biology, Chemistry and Maths

Insurance:
University College London
Biochemical Engineering (MEng)
3/4 years
ABB-any order

now, it's accommodation hunting time. of course, not literally. i just need to fill in some forms.
at first i wanted to have a single room, en-suite bathroom and self-catered, but when i found out that PNB's policy of 80-20 is no longer available, i really need to come up with plan B.

after replying to UCAS last thursday, i'm now patiently waiting for any letter/email from imperial regarding my accommodation application. the deadline is 31st of july!

Once you have accepted an academic offer from Imperial College London you will receive an email or letter with instructions of our online application procedure from May 2009 onwards.

UCL forms are here ages ago, i'm almost done filling'em up. need to get my latest passport photos and choose my residence.

will be updating more later~

phew!

last night was a bit topsy-turby when suddenly ali and p.chek noted out that we have chemistry homework! we decided not to do it. a bit reluctant so, i tucked into bed early to forget about it.

so class started as usual:

block 2
chemistry! we decided not to remind mr hanson of the homework. so, he went on teaching xray crystallography and MRI. pretty interesting but i was sleepy the whole class. managed to answer the question sheet he gave us during class. alhamdulillah. he did not mention anything about the homework. he did remind us to bring our calculators for the rest of he week as we'll be doing maths..something to do with some coefficients and stuff. what did i tell you? i was sleepy the whole class!! XD

block 4
biology! mr vroege gave us mock paper 5 for this wednesday. bio paper 5 is really hard to score! then, we continued with biotech and finished it. he went through our homework for the week and i'm looking forward to start our 2nd last chapter of the syllabus tomorrow! crop plants!

block 3
mr hanson gave us more booklet after during block 2. so i ended up in the RC doing as much as i could while syafiq yazid reading bio and fara ain over the clouds with her IELTS results. haha.

block 6
maths! we did some questions on type I and type II errors and bloody hell i didn't get the answers! ms aizan set a few questions for discussion tomorrow.

block 5 and 1
went really unproductive! had a really really long nap. so much for starting p3 revision! and i realize something. panasnye lembah beringin!!!!

after maghrib i went back to the chalet trying to do the s2 questions set by ms aizan. alhamdulillah i got'em. stupid careless mistakes! no wonder i didn't get the answers in class. did my biology homework as well. now planning to do some p3 revision but ended up writing this. *sigh* and i still have a few things to clarify my with my s2 stuff. someone please help me!!

transformasi menjadi basi..

warning: to AF fans only!

wake up people..it's obvious that some of the participants need to be kicked out of the ACADEMY!!
tak layak!macam bagus plak tuh..bajet..poyo..vocal bukannye mantop pon!pity adila..she shouldn't be the one to leave..si A and Q tuh ah..memang tak patut masuk in the first place..wakaka..emo terlebih plak..kinda sleepy right now..buku bio dah di jengah..papers chemistry dah di'conteng'..past years s2 dah di'jamah'..p3 je lagi blom sentuh..huhu..anyway, might i say this; AF7 has the best participants so far..

my rank:
hafiz-mantop!
claudia-bayangan stacy
aisyah-bayangan mila
akim-vocal yang unik, practice menari lagi ye~

fever..

college is resuming..
mock exam is coming up shortly..
AF7 is on..
hafiz rocks!
claudia rocks!
aisyah rocks!
akim rocks!

my bio, chem and maths not rocking! XD

*dead meat*

contradiciton, irony..??

"sediakan payung sebelum hujan"

"dengar guruh di langit, air di tempayan dicurahkan"

think about it..

if this was 5 months ago, my FRIEND..

Tonight, I look through your window,
It’s orange, just the way I like it,
But it’s yours, not mine,
I saw my reflection,
It’s mine, in yours.

Then I thought to myself,
What has been happening all this while?
Our time is running out,
And how you wished things can be like they used to,
Not sure whether that’s still your wish,
But maybe now it’s mine.

I’m a coward,
I can’t face you,
Not anymore,
After all the things you thought of me,
You seem to be OK with this silence,
So I’ll keep my tongue tied.

If only I could turn back time,
If only I knew how you valued me,
Or maybe you used to or have been,
It doesn’t make any difference,
I should have known better,
You’re a novice when it comes to expressing yourself.

Just one wish,
Just one hope,
Before time slips and leaves us apart,
You’ll make the right choice,
And I’ll make the right decision.

P/s: I regret for not giving you the second chance that you longed for.

and just for the record..

if you see someone who supposedly your ex-best friend or friend or whatever having fun with someone else like you used to with him/her, would you be jealous??and by the definition of 'jealous'- he spotted you 'spying', your facial expression changed, you avoided the eye-to-eye contact and you left as fast as you could. just a random thought really~

rambling like always

it has been a while since i last updated this blog. a lot has happened for the past few weeks and if it wasn't for the bloody wireless connection in college, i might be able to write something. anyway, i'm really looking forward to going back home for the weekend. although a short one, it's nothing that i would have missed. so, now i'm back as a normal student. no more "unacademic" things to worry. glad that whole busy student life is over. nothing new except the fact that currently i'm totally obsessed with Puteri Gunung Ledang the musical. Love the songs, love the dance and love everything about it. i even spent my entire time on the bus listening to the songs- journey to Kuala Gandah, the elephant conservation trip thing for senior biologists last saturday, the day after i went to watch PGL at Istana Budaya. I had a lot to say for the past few weeks especially the post bangsawan "drama", the new house committee "drama" but time didn't permit me. so, literally wrote it out in my mind rather than spilling them up here. owh and not forgetting my overly depression over IELTS results. i could have done better if I were so into it during the exam. hut, i wasn't. so, it's my bad. and recently i've been keeping in touch with someone that i hadn't really spoken to for like two years???but that made up my day really. good to listen to her laughs, and we laughed alot back then. things were really great over these few weeks. shouldn't put too much hope on a better life in the near future. mock exam is on it's way and so far, "proudly" i'd say that i've only started my revision with S2. time is running short. gotta get my lazy bump moving. but i see some positive changes in me-i'd spend my free blocks in the RC doing homework and catching up with my studies. a good sign that insyaAllah, i'll meet the requirements for my Universities' offers which comes to another dilemma! UCL or Imperial??haven't really decided on that. the good thing is, Pn Kas will be talking bout it with us soon. and my obsession with the nanny, gossip girl and other stuff is realling freakin' me out!why can't i have an obsession with my A2 books for a change??! clock is ticking and i just completed gossip girl season 1 in 3 days. nothing to be proud of!but it's good that i've completed my homework prior to watching it. it's like a self-rewarding thing which actually drives me to do something beneficial. well, lots of random stuff and sooo inorganised. that's me. loving my life now! but things should get rough soon! savour the good times now. "kill" myself later LOL. till then~

p/s: i might give some updates on the past activities when i'm at home- that is, if i still remember =)

to manusia bodoh and sesiape lah yg ttbe x puas hati ngan aku

aku x phm..sape yg gaduh??sape yg x puas hati?
ke ade org yg bwk mulut??bawak fitnah x tentu hala??

exricated!

i'm free!

the truth..

after getting my AS results, i made my own expectation of the components' results. however, things turned out to be really unexpected!!

Biology
Expected: AAB
Actual: BAA

comment: i'm really surprised!!B for paper 1???!!and A for paper 3??!!never in my life i got A for it~

Chemistry
Expected: AAB
Actual: ABA

comment: the paper 3 was the same day with Cambridge interview and i really screwed it up because get a valid results for the experiments. paper 2, a lot of careless mistakes and i didn't include the silly mistakes that i've made..

Mathematics
Expected: AA
Actual: AA

comment: alhamdulillah. but if they have 3 papers, i might screw the other one up..hehe..you'll see what i mean.

Physics
Expected: ACA
Actual: ABA

comment: i underestimated myself too much LOL

Overall comment: the results are unexpected but alhamdulillah..i don't have to re-sit any of them..i wonder if i'll do a chi-squared test on this...

alhamdulillah~

my hard work paid off..all the praise to Allah s.w.t. Congratulations also to KYUEMians batch 10 and 10.5!!some of us might not get the results that we want. but, it's not the end of the world. your failure might be a stepping stone to a success. to those who succeed, this might be a stepping stone to a greater success in the future. syukur!~

a director's thought..

i'm currently suffering from bipolar disorder. my life is a big mess. my room is even in a bigger mess than ever; not that it has always been neat. but it was way tidier than now. i've lost my ability to do homework. turning into an insomniac. even a nap during lunch time seems impossible. lost my ability to socialise; i lock myself in my room every night trying to cope with my academic but always ends in vain. lost the ability to laugh at jokes. suddenly feels that 'the nanny' can never makes me laugh anymore. going to blow up any time soon. hoping that my fellow housemates would lend a hand with all of the work now that Bangsawan is just around the corner. utter anxious with my AS result which should be released in 2 days time. classes are no longer enjoyable since i have lots of things lingering in my head. looking forward to this friday; the date when the finalised script is to be handed in. i'm grateful that i have some good friends and juniors who are willing to sacrifice their precious time with those Bangsawan work. i hope that things will be better after the meeting with Pn Halijah at 5pm today because i don't want to lose my temper any time soon. Garnetors, please wake up!! all of you are old enough to think for yourself. don't be tooooo self-centred. if you have test, we have TESTS. if you're having exam this semester, this is OUR LAST SEMESTER and WE ONLY HAVE ONE SHOT AT IT. hear me, and hear me now. or you'll here my LOUDEST voice which i haven't had for the past 3 years. Let's do our best now so that we can savour our good time later. i expect nothing less from all of you!

at last..

remember the interview with dr suzanne farid and also the email that i received from UCL a few weeks ago???if you don't, then click here for the interview and here for the email.

at last, they have decided to update my UCAS track yesterday!now, i have a reminder saying that:

and i don't have to wait anymore~

the overall results:

date: 24th October 2008
University of Warwick(W20)
Biochemistry(C700)
BBB which includes Biology and Chemistry

date: 29th October 2008
University College London(U80)
Biochemistry(C700)
AAB - Biology, Chemistry and Maths respectively
Pass Physics at AS Level
IELTS 7.0 with minimum of 6.5 in each component

date: 5th December 2008
Imperial College London(I50)
Biochemistry(C700)
AAB - Biology, Chemistry and Maths respectively

date: 6th January 2009
University of Cambridge(C05)
Natural Sciences(BCF0)
Unsuccessful

date: 16th January 2009
University College London(U80)
Biochemical Engineering(H811)
ABB - subjects not specified
Pass in Physics at AS Level

so, there are 4 conditional offers and 1 rejection~=)

hiatus!!

bangsawan, test and homework!!blog: on hold!~

kawan-kawan yg menjadikan P20 sebagai ruang persinggahan: tolong lah senyap sket!!~jgn la absent-minded sgt..org nk study...!!

tensi!!!!!!

goodbye cambridge!!~ hello Imperial and UCL!!

it's not the end of the world!~ everything happens for a reason. one door closes, another one opens! now to find the right door~ =S

finally the decision has been made. a little sad but kind of relieved because i don't have to wait for it anymore. praise to Allah since i still have the other 4 offers. but now, i'm in a dilemma. UCL or imperial?? i know it's still to early to decide. but, before you know it, the time will come. this semester will be way hectic and time will fly!!it's either now, while it's still abit loose and free or the last minute when i need to prepare for trials, A2 and other important stuff! maybe i have a solid reason to not think about it now. the result for my UCL biochemical engineering is yet to be announced officially in UCAS. AAA? AAB? ABB? BBB? owh well, i know the minimum will be BBB. just hope for the best insya Allah! now that, everything is over, not officially, time to grab those As and meet all the requirements!!~ がんばって!!~

i have to do what i have to do..

*sigh**sigh**sigh**sigh**sigh**sigh**sigh*
*sigh**sigh**sigh**sigh**sigh**sigh**sigh*

i'm going back to college.
really soon.
should be right about now.
the dreaded moment has finally come.
going to see mr vroege, mr hanson, ms aizan and ms castaldo again~
going to see my friends again!!!! =)
well, it might not be that bad after all~

*yay!**yay!**yay!**yay!**yay!**yay!**yay!*
*yay!**yay!**yay!**yay!**yay!**yay!**yay!*

baffled

it's really weird, when the end credits start to roll, the whole theatre breaks into laughter. especially it's a horror movie. they go,
"what the hell??"
"omg..i just spent 10 bucks just to confuse myself!"
"glad thats over, i thought my add maths is sooo much easier to understand."
"LMAO..i don't understand a thing!"

guess what??that happened to me. DARK FLOORS!!

personal comment: this movie has a lot of good horror elements. but the script is a bit weak. and they do need to explain to the audience what the hell is going on. everyone felt as if they were bamboozled after the movie. huh!

my theory: Sarah is an autistic girl who possesses psychic ability to foresee the future with her drawing. but i have no idea what does the "red crayon" represent. tobias on the other hand is dead but his soul is trapped in his own body. and this evil spirit which looks like Dark Lord in Ragnarok online traps 6 innocence in a time loop, in the hospital where everyone is dead except these chosen 6. and every floor in the hospital is a different time dimension which is parallel to each other. so basically the dark lord messes up with sarah, tobias, ben-sarah's dad, emily-a nurse(i think), ric, walter and jon. eventually everyone dies in the end leaving sarah with her so-called fate. but each time sarah confronts the dark lord face to face, the whole event starts again. it's like deja vu!and only sarah and tobias know this.

dr walter is dead!

sarah feels something!

so i searched in the net for some explanation and i found a good one:

I've heard some folks say that Dark Floors is confusing almost to the point of madness and that the only thing they can figure out is that they are running from the Lordi crew. So I'm here to explain whats going on.

Everyone in the movie is dead. They can't help it but they are dead. The little girl, Sarah, and the hobo dude know this. They say she may be epileptic or have some mental disorder well she does. She has been driven insane by the knowledge that she and everyone she interacts with is already dead and can do nothing about it. So insane in fact that she appears autistic to the others. The MRI machine blowing up is the first signal that they are dead because when one of those things goes it releases tons of electric energy and would kill anyone in the vicinity. The second is the hobo walking up to her in the hall and saying something which later we learn is "Sarah, I'm not cold anymore" indication that the hobo gets to move on or something like that. The link that hobbo joe and sarah seem to share is there because they are both dead and know it. hobo joe has probly been through this a million times and knows whats gonna happen just as well as she does. The only difference being that this time he gets to go on finally.

My first theory is that in the Lordi universe the Lordi crew has decided for their own amusement they will trap 6 innocent souls in a pocket hell that repeats itself.

My second theory is that Sarah may not be dead but either asleep or in a coma. Ever had a dream where you did something but later the dream started over with minute detail changes? The crayon being red the first time then blue the second supports this theory.

Now at the end of the movie you see Sarah confronting Mr. Lordi himself and she says "I would like to go home now". This will support the pocket hell theory because clearly in her light filled form she is completely sane and reasonable. But Mr. Lordi apparently has other ideas like torturing her psyche for all time or something.

All in all I would say that everyone is dead and with the exception of hobo joe and sarah do not know it and are therefore damned or tormented by the Lordi crew into an endless repeating hellish illusion until they realize and accept whats going on.

i got it from here~

pretty cool. my theory is quite close. only that i didn't know that MRI can do such damage!

stop nailin' it..

NAIL IN THE FENCE

There once was a little boy who had a bad
temper.

His Father gave him a bag of nails
and told him that every time he lost his temper,
he must hammer a nail into the back
of the fence.

The first day the boy had
driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next
few weeks, as he learned to control his
anger, the number of nails hammered daily
gradually dwindled down. He discovered
it was easier to hold his temper than to
drive those nails into the fence.


Finally the day came when the boy didn't
lose his temper at all.
He told his father about it
and the father suggested that
the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he
was able to hold
his temper.

The days passed and the young boy was finally
able to tell his father that all the nails
were gone.
The father took his son
by the hand
and led him to the fence
He said,

'You have done well, my son,
but look at the holes in the fence.
The fence will never be the same.


When you say things in anger,
they leave a scar just like this one.


You can't put a knife in a man and draw it out
without leaving a wound in his body.


It won't matter how many times you say 'I'm sorry',
the wound is still there.
A verbal
wound is as bad as a physical one.

Friends are very rare jewels, indeed.

They make you smile
and encourage you to succeed.
They lend an ear,
they share words of praise
and they always want to open their hearts to us.'

YOU ARE MY FRIEND AND I AM HONORED!
Please forgive me if I have ever left a hole.

crush!!!!`~

wizards of waverly place's Selena Gomez!!she's sweet and gorgeous!!w0ot!!haha..hyper terlebih~~owh yea..she's a 1992..

this is so true..

"Relationship is like a thigh; you start off smooth, then a little lumpy. But, without them, you don't have leg to stand on."

-Sylvia Fine, The Nanny-

deaf by the barber~

i had a haircut just now. my barber was an indian guy. he was actually talking to me or "trying to have a decent conversation" with me.

"rambut ok x?"
"i can't see. need my specs"
"ok"

he continued while iput back my specs on the desk in front.

"umur brape?"

buzz..buzzz..buzz..-the hair shaver buzzes in my ears

"erk..(i couldn't hear a thing except the buzzing)..mm..rabun jauh??"

i was just putting my specs off. so, i assumed it was:

"rabun ape??"

lol..
and he repeated the question so i said 19, and he sed he arrived frm india same age as me. now 23. like i care??and he went on and on about i dunno what. kept nodding but couldnt hear a thing. deaf by the barber lol!!

and i have a question??do americans eat cili padi??beacause the nasi goreng USA i had just now had lots of them!!ROFL

witty nanny~

CC: ooo.. how does she do it to him all the time??
Niles: it's a female thing, you'll never understand..

-Cecilia(CC) Babcock and Niles-

Maxwell: Niles, get this trash out of here..
(handing him the 'Gloss" magazine)
Niles: you heard the man!move it!!(staring at CC)

-Maxwell Sheffield and Niles-

"Like my cousin Toddy always says; if you want to be dead, be drop dead!"

-Fran Fine-